I went to see Ugly Duckling last night and as shows go it was unusual enough to prompt me to share a few pointers about enhancing your gig-going experience and in particular your Ugly Duckling gig-going experience, should you find yourself at a UD gig on their current tour to promote new LP Audacity (Read monkeyboxing.com review of Audacity).
1. Firstly, going up to MC Dizzy Dustin in the crowd before the show, shaking his hand and having a quick chat is all acceptable, as is enquiring into the possibility of an interview after the show. He’s very friendly and amenable.
2. Knocking a pint over on the table next to where Dizzy is sat so that it pours into his lady friend’s boot causing her to remove the boot in order to pour it out again, is both clumsy and embarrassing and should be avoided if at all possible.
3. Proferring apologies to said lady and then standing around uselessly while said boot is put back on is polite, if ineffectual. However, making claims like, “Sorry about that, I’m not drunk,” will (even if true) sound like the most desperate kind of pathetic lie.
4. Subsequently, to actually get drunk will have dire consequences for the success of writing a gig review. It may cause you to do some or all of the following: forget that you have a camera with which to take pictures of the band, forget virtually all the set except for a few split second visual flashes and the bizarrely clear recall that at the very end of the gig, after the music stopped Dizzy very kindly bigged up monkeyboxing.com to the crowd despite 2 and 3 above. It may also lead to 5, below.
5. Being introduced to Ugly Duckling’s other MC, Andy Cat by Dizzy is exactly the sort of opportunity that should be taken full advantage if you’re the editor of a music website. Being so refreshed that the only thing you can really remember is thinking how tall Andy C is when he’s speaking to you is not taking full advantage. Nor is it polite.
I’d would like, therefore, to take this opportunity to publicly apologise to Ugly Duckling (who always put on a class show) and particularly to the lady whose boots I soaked, whilst reminding all monkeyboxing.com readers that alcohol should be enjoyed sensibly and in moderation. Or you will pay in the morning.